Electric Landlady

not wrong at all!

2008-07-04T13:15:03Z

Interview of Pratchett by Gaiman. Via cleolinda.

Am staying home today to work and hang with my dog. Wish me luck.

oh so wrong

2008-07-04T12:29:16Z

Via Uncertain Principles: Err Lingus: a really impressively inaccurate destination map. You'll never guess where they put Buffalo.

And in that spirit, Happy 4th, Americans!

A thing of beauty

2008-06-27T14:53:18Z

Via New Scientist's Short Sharp Science blog: Scientist does intricate 20-year experiment involving evolution of E. coli. Conservapaedia founder gets irked, demands data. Scientist writes back. Conservapaedia founder gets rude. The result (in Ben Goldacre's words): all time classic creationist pwnage.

Makes my little heart sing, I tell ya.

I hadn't heard about this!

2008-06-26T22:37:22Z

Amazing story: Pony with prosthetic leg. (Via Snopes.)

(Oh hey, there's a video! Long blither about LSU, but you do get to Molly eventually.)

electricland @ 2008-06-10T11:33:00

2008-06-10T15:37:19Z

OH MY GOD THERE'S ANOTHER MARGARET OF ASHBURY NOVEL AND I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT IT!

Ahem.

I'm very excited. I'd almost lost hope of ever reading anything more by Judith Merkle Riley.

Pretty edition, too. I would order it right now, except I just ordered the special edition of the Chronicles of Master Li and Number Ten Ox and I feel it would be greedy. And the library catalogue is down. Soon, though. Soon.

Now, if only Rosemary Kirstein would get on with the next volume in the Steerswoman story...

hm.

2008-06-06T19:31:55Z

Two things:

1. Surely if ever there was a sign of the impending apocalypse, it is the $75 ~~cardboard box~~ open-ended toy that encourages imaginative play.

2. If you go to Amazon.com's home page and it senses your Canadian IP address (I'm guessing), you get a big badge that says "Shopping from Canada? Magasinez-vous depuis le Canada?" I am almost certain that "depuis" is not the right word in this context.

Oh, and 3. It is Friday afternoon and I want to go home.

Portrait of a pair of con artists

2008-05-28T16:13:48Z

"Hey baby, guess what?"
"What?"
"John and Helen are going out later, but I happen to know that Jen will be coming by to feed us."
"So?"
"Pay attention. This is the plan. We eat all our kibble, and then when John and Helen come back, we look really pathetic and frantic."
"And?"
"And Helen will feed us again."
"Will she really fall for that?"
"Trust me."

It worked. OK, in the real world they probably didn't have advance notice. But they do have this very strange relationship, wherein sometimes Tilde lies on her back and Blue nuzzles her -- we call that the Venus phase -- and sometimes Blue nips at Tilde until she starts chasing him while snarling and (because apparently snarling tickles her nose) sneezing. That would be the Mars phase.

Jen and I went to see Indiana Jones. It was OK. Very fun in spots. Could have been shorter. Nice to see Karen Allen again. Loved Cate Blanchett's hair.

Puppies!

2008-05-21T14:20:59Z

I lost about an hour on YouTube last night. It all started with this video of an Airedale babysitting six Scottie puppies. I defy you not to laugh and/or go "Awwww!". DEFY YOU.

Airedale puppy meets ball:

electricland @ 2008-05-20T12:58:00

2008-05-20T17:14:12Z

This weekend I bucked tradition and did not go up to the cottage with the rest of the family. Blue and I had a quiet weekend at home. (He has yet to see the cottage.) Almost too quiet. Saturday I went to the annual Beaches Garden Society sale (my uncle John was volunteering) and did what all the books say you should not do, i.e. wander around aimlessly without any kind of plan, saying "Oooh, that looks nice" and buying whatever caught my eye. I think I ended up with an OK selection despite this, and the prices were certainly right. It was a bit of a mixed bag, though. I spent the rest of the day creating a table listing plant name, height, spacing, colour, sunlight and moisture requirements, and anything else that seemed useful. Then I made another grid of height vs. sunlight requirements and put all my new purchases on it. Then I put the plants that are already in the garden on it, on the theory that if they've survived this long they're probably in OK conditions. Then I had a nap. Then I made a plan. Then I dithered for a while. I finally shoved the new plants in the ground yesterday -- we'll see how they do. Not one was over $7 and most of them were about $2.50, so I'm not too bothered.

Sunday I went to choir, an event remarkable in that I left Blue home alone with a voice recorder on (something I've been meaning to do for a while). I was gone almost 3 hours; there was a bout of intermittent howling for 10 or 12 minutes about 20 minutes after I left, and then complete silence. And he greeted me in complete silence without jumping up -- a minor miracle! He was wagging his entire body so that it was forming circles, and had a chewie in his mouth. It was extremely cute.

Monday I met pretentiousgit at Harbourfront for the Toronto International Circus Festival. An old acquaintance of mine, Seth Bloom -- we were kids together in Kenya, more than 20 years ago, and our parents have kept up and his parents now live in Rome -- was performing and I'd promised to come down. Very glad I did, as it was a great show. Was complaining that Harbourfront never seems to publicize its stuff very well -- does anyone else find that? Or is it just that I don't read the right papers? Anyway, it was great to catch up a little with Seth and meet his wife and fellow performer Christina. But it was COLD. pretentiousgit pointed out that it is not unknown for it to snow on Victoria Day weekend. But STILL.

The rest of the family came back from the cottage while I was out and kidnapped my dog, but they brought him back eventually. I bought groceries and Jen and I watched some Monarch of the Glen (season 2; we are going through in order).

Our Green Bin is in pitiful shape, i.e. barely bin-shaped at all. The raccoons got at it twice over the weekend.

I have much more work to do on the house, but all in all it was a decent weekend.

Dear Toronto tourism officials: Screw you.

2008-05-16T02:15:56Z

You know what always puts me in a wonderful friendly mood, ready and eager to welcome visitors to my hometown and show off its good points?

If you guessed "Chiding from the tourist board", you are so right!

OK, no, actually, I lied. This is pissing me off.

A campaign launched under the slogan "We've been expecting you" is meant to make sure tourists feel wanted and loved from the minute they arrive at the airport, train station or hotel.

It will encourage average folks to do things like stop on the street to help a visitor fumbling with a map, or go out of their way to explain how the subway system works.

"It goes beyond customer service. It's the sense of welcome. It's the things you would do if someone were coming to your house – spruce up the house, get the candles out, put the kids in the backyard," said David Whitaker, president and CEO of Tourism Toronto.

OK, knee-jerk reactions first:
1. The word "folks" always makes me grind my teeth.
2. This "coming to your house" metaphor is both (a) condescending and (b) clueless:
(a) Nothing against tourists. I like tourists fine. I often stop to help people fumbling with maps, or point them towards the subway. (I work a block away from the bus station, so I get a lot of opportunity.) But the difference between tourists and people coming to my house is that tourists are perfect strangers who have chosen to spend time in my city, and people who come to my house are friends I have invited there.
(b) Toronto's a big city. Where do you propose that I put the candles?
3. Excuse me, customer service? WTF? Do I get a salary for that? Sorry if this comes as a shock to you, Mr. Whitaker, but Toronto is not a product I am selling on your behalf. Toronto is where I live. It is my home.
4. Exactly how is talking down to your citizenry the way to make us all shiny happy friendly welcoming, er, average folks?

...surveys show today's tourists go home a lot less satisfied with their visits here than they did 10 years ago.

Fair enough, I can see why this would give the tourist board pause. Tourism is important to the economy, and word of mouth is important to tourism. Seriously, though, does the proposed remedy smack of desperate neediness to anyone else? Is this Toronto's "world-class city" obsession for the new millennium?

Still in the planning stages, the "We've been expecting you" campaign could include welcome buttons or signs, and extra training for hospitality staff. It could also mean a city-wide campaign on bus shelters, in subway stations and even bumper stickers on government cars.

Residents could be educated on the importance of tourism to the economy and the role they can play to make the city much more welcoming.

Royson James is rightly critical of the hand-wringing, but makes some good points about the real problems:

So, why are industry officials nervous, edgy, saying things like, "We must take it to the next level. It's just not good enough?"

Because competitor cities are constantly upgrading and improving. Because fewer Americans are coming, worried or put off as they are by passport requirements and less buying power with the Yankee dollar.

Not that he's quite managed to avoid chiding us either:

Because local attractions are viewed as tired and visitors say, increasingly, they are not getting as much as they expected from their visits. Because more and more view our service as below expectations.

Because few outside the well-connected know that Toronto is a gem of a location. And those who do aren't telling enough about it.

Because Torontonians are at once too modest and too self-satisfied – not prone to brag about Toronto's achievements, unmotivated to compete for first place.

Unfortunately, his solution boils down to "better advertising." It might get us somewhere, but I don't think it's the whole story.

Here's my suggestion. Rather than haranguing the people who live here and fretting over what we can do to make random strangers from faraway places like us better, how about starting at home? Sell the city to Torontonians. Encourage us to explore a neighbourhood in another part of town. Play up the many different attractions we have. Explain how to get there using public transit. Publicize the routes of walking tours. Make it easier to get around by bike. Slap up some plaques to show more pride in local history. Charge less than bloody $20 to get into the ROM (ostensibly a public institution). Take down the 15-ft ~~advertising~~ sorry, information pillar in front of City Hall, which makes me want to spit every time I pass it (twice a working day, at minimum). Fix the TTC.

You want us to show pride in our city and make visitors feel welcome? Give us something to be proud of, tell us about it, trust us to be our typical friendly helpful selves, and get off our backs.

hee!

2008-05-09T21:07:26Z

No, I haven't let this story go yet. More news on the train quarantine and I am chuckling over this:

The elderly female who was transferred to a Timmins hospital is doing much better, [Dr. Donald] Low [microbiologist-in-chief at Mt. Sinai and one of the go-to guys for infectious disease outbreaks] added.

"She's fine," he said. "She's a febrile." Everything worked as it should in the time of a potential health disaster, said Low.

I am chuckling because:

a) I do not think he said what you thought he said.
b) He probably said "afebrile", which (knowing doctors as I do) is exactly what I would expect a doctor to say to a reporter without much health background instead of, oh, "she doesn't have a fever."
c) Yeah, that could be Word's fault or a copy editor's fault. I don't care. It's still funny.

eeek!

2008-05-09T16:24:15Z

A Via train has been quarantined in what looks on the Google map to be the Middle of Absolutely Nowhere, Northern Ontario, but is in fact the small town of Foleyet. 1 passenger dead, 10 taken to hospital, paramedics in full protection gear...

Does it make me a bad person that I am kind of riveted?

(Other stories: City, taking the high road*; Globe; CBC.)

*When I wrote that, the banner on their video clip was DEATH TRAIN QUARANTINED. Srsly.

leaving...

2008-04-22T19:37:23Z

I think I'm actually ready!

Of my pre-trip "things to do" list, I haven't cut my hair, but other than that I'm all set. I have a small suitcase, with another bag in it just in case I buy wonderful things. Small yet versatile wardrobe. Euros. Camera. Passport. Ticket. In case of emergency phone numbers.

Have consigned Blue to the care of Jen and her parents. Am worried that he'll miss me, but am quite sure he'll have a perfectly fine time without me.

Am of course leaving a stack of things at work to get done when I get back. There Is Always More Work. Oh well, it's not for that long.

Memos to struggling fashion retailers

2008-04-21T21:26:15Z

Dear Gap:

You would probably sell more clothes if you ever had anything in a
size larger than Medium, or about 6, for more than half an hour after
you uncrate it.

I am just a lowly shopper, of course, without any pretensions to the
kind of high-powered retail smarts you are doubtless applying to your
current impressive business turnaround. But I would have thought that
the stacks and stacks of clothes in your sales bins marked XS and S
and 0 and 2 might be some kind of clue.

Love,

me (who bought a black cardigan in medium, but would really have
preferred a large)

Dear Cotton Ginny:

I am your demographic. Your clothes fit me, and I like them.
Furthermore, I live around the corner from one of your stores. Here is
how to get me to buy more of your clothes:

Sustainable is good, and wacky experimental-fibre experimental-design
clothing is all very well in its way, but could you kindly arrange to
have the basics available more than four months out of twelve? And by
basics I mean jeans that fit, T-shirts in colours that don't make my
eyeballs bleed, and a reasonable selection of seasonal casual wear.

(Thank you for not falling prey to Gap's sizing problem, though.)

Thank you for your kind attention to this matter.

Love,

me

random Friday musings, and puppy update

2008-04-18T14:52:35Z

The problem with doing yoga once a week (on Thursdays. At lunch, in a spare office) is that I am spacey for the whole afternoon and very stiff and sore (good stiff and sore, though) the following day.

Hurray for Friday, though! It's gorgeous here. If I'd known it was going to go up to 25 I might have worn a skirt.

Followed instructions when picking up Blue yesterday evening with MIRACULOUS RESULTS. (Said instructions were: Call ahead to ask aunt & uncle to put him out in the back yard. Enter the house. Ask them to let him back in. Wait in the hall. Once he spots me, calmly pre-empt the customary BOUNCE! FLING! IT'S YOU! OMG OMG OMG! with high-value treats.* Have him sit. Keep on with the treats. And it WORKED.) Other dog owners have already commented on the change -- we saw the Golden that he hates this morning, and I took him into a driveway and had him sit and fed him treats and he was great, and the Golden's person remarked on how good he was being.

*Turkey franks and string cheese, in this case.

dog behaviourist update

2008-04-17T18:02:35Z

The long-awaited appointment with the dog behaviourist was last night. Went really well! Some highlights:

- Blue is a nice dog. (We knew this, but it's good to have outside confirmation.) Many of his behaviour issues are down to being a 2-year-old. He will eventually grow a brain, but probably not for another year or two.
- Even though I got him from the breeder, having bounced through several households he is functionally a rescue dog, and that also plays into the behaviour.
- She's not quite sure what's up with the separation anxiety, but we have a bunch of stuff to work on: here-you-stay-in-this-room-while-I-go-downstairs, practice tying up and going into stores a whole lot while on walks, leave for a few hours a day with some frozen bones to occupy him, etc.
- Lots and lots of work on manners, in the house and out. No bouncing around barking mindlessly and building up adrenaline. No greeting other dogs on leash. In the presence of other dogs, cats, squirrels, etc., give lots of space and keep him working.
- Italian meatballs are yummy.
- Tying his leash to my belt to free up my hands works astonishingly well.
- We'll be trying a citronella collar.

In other news, AAARGH TTC STRIKE. (Probably.)

electricland @ 2008-04-15T15:12:00

2008-04-15T19:13:55Z

from mthrtongue: Men Explain Things To Me, by Rebecca Solnit.

Had me nodding "yes, yes!" all the way down the page.

does being an idiot about being an idiot cancel out the idiocy?

2008-04-15T19:01:33Z

Probably not, huh?

Turns out I could've phoned the Help Desk from home and they would have sorted it all out for me. Oh well. I got a lift in courtesy of Uncle John, so got to hang out with Jen and the puppies for slightly longer than I would have otherwise. And I'm being fairly productive.

My hair still needs washing, though.

in which I am an idiot

2008-04-15T13:12:46Z

About a month ago, my boss called me into his office, told me how much my work is valued, and handed me a shiny new laptop. I goggled and stammered and managed to say Thank You.

It's been all configured so I can work from home. I was all set to do this today, except... I have managed to forget my PIN for VPN access.

GAAAH.

Guess I'm going in today after all. I suppose having to wash one's hair is not an adequate excuse for shirking.

It's the little things

2008-04-14T14:58:36Z

It is impressive, she mused, seeming impressed out of all proportion to the size of the revelation, how small things can make a large difference in your life.

For example: Jen regularly forgets her keys. (Six times in the six weeks after she moved in to the house.) So she bought a key safe. Result: elimination of forgotten-key stress. (Except briefly when it froze this winter, but we managed.)

I am not at my mental best early in the morning, and the changing weather has meant frequent changes of coat. So I've put together a walking-the-dog bag, containing extending leash, treats, clicker, plastic bag supply, emergency squeaky toy, spare keys, and Starbucks card. Voila! Peace of mind on morning walks.

I also keep lip balm, a pack of tissues, and a small bottle of hand sanitizer in every coat I own, plus my bag. When you have rhinitis triggered by absolutely everything, the tissues in particular are very important.

For some reason, the moment when I figure out some solution like this is always a moment of stunning insight, instantly followed by "why on earth didn't I think of that sooner? Duh."

How about you? Any small things you've done that have improved your life?

electricland @ 2008-04-11T11:30:00

2008-04-11T15:31:02Z

In fact, I hate Lotus Notes so much that I have just signed up for Remember The Milk instead. Will let you all know how it goes.

(Do you know how many mouse clicks are required to delete a recurring task in Lotus Notes? Eight. I counted. EIGHT. That's if you know what you're doing.)

I hate Lotus Notes.

2008-04-11T15:07:30Z

Having just transferred my To-Do list into Lotus Notes, I am remembering why I was keeping it on paper all these years. IT'S BECAUSE LOTUS NOTES SUCKS.

I know we all love to bash Microsoft, but OMG Outlook is a miracle of intuitive usability compared to this BLOODY STUPID PROGRAM. AAAAAARGH.

*ahem*

Sorry, just needed to get that out.

electricland @ 2008-04-07T23:05:00

2008-04-08T03:11:13Z

In among various bits and bobs and boxes from Granny's apartment, we recently came across a stash of knitting needles. I have just sorted and catalogued them all in my Ravelry account and it took, ooh, about 2 hours. There are a LOT. Mostly in smaller gauges -- we're going to have to start knitting stuff for babies. The grand champion is 17 2.75-mm double-points, but as those come in sets of 4 or 5 it's actually not as impressive as the 16 3-mm straight needles (in 3 different lengths, but still). Smallest is a set of 2-mm double-points. Largest is a pair of 7.5-mm straight needles (Jen has a pair the same size, in case we should happen to need two). And there is a lone 5.5-mm circular needle, in a rather fetching pale green.

So the next question is, what on earth do we keep them in?

News flash!

2008-03-28T18:14:41Z

Maybe it's me, but if I were a Canadian farmer, I'd feel pretty goddamm patronized by "joeyjb"'s comment at the bottom of this article: Organic farmers lagging behind demand at the supermarket: StatsCan

"FARMERS TAKE NOTE. People are willing to pay more for good healthy food," Joey informs us. Gosh, really? If you were a farmer, how would you respond? I favour:

"I already produce good healthy food, dumbass."

Or possibly: "Thank God we have you, JoeyJB! The damn trade associations like Canadian Organic Growers never share nuggets of wisdom like that one!"

And that's without getting into exactly how much of what you pay at the supermarket actually goes into farmers' pockets.

I think this may have caused a crucial circuit in my brain to blow, so what would you tell our buddy Joey?

lighten up, people!

2008-03-27T20:03:45Z

Hyperbole, n. (1) A rhetorical device of emphasis for exaggeration or effect. (2) Something just about everyone (naming no names) who has read Robin Hobb's stern warning about blogs seems to be totally incapable of recognizing. (Fortunately, however, not everyone.)

Sometimes I think the Internet killed irony. Maybe she should've put an emoticon or two in there.